Love is just a waste of our energy.

:/

My thoughts on love are too complicated. I fall so easily in and out of love. I've fallen in love with one of my friend's neighbour and I've fallen in love with a guy at my school. Then all of a sudden I've fallen in love with someone I don't even know who lives in another state. I don't even understand any of this. It's so complicated. It brings me down and it still ends up keeping me around. I need something different. I'm so sick and tired of love. There isn't anything I could do right now.

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On a brighter note: yesterday was the medallion ceremony. It was alright. I sat next to Alex and we were joking the whole time through it. Graduation is almost here.

Get Up, Recover!

Apparently, since I've been painting so much, my niece now wants to be like this and paint too. I'm surprised that lately she's been trying to be like me. It's a nice feeling at times, I actually don't mind. She's been begging my sister for paint. I'd lend her some of mine, but things get too messy! And acrylic paint does not wash out 99% of the times. Especially now that we moved into this house WHICH THE 2ND FLOOR IS COVERED IN CARPET. Maybe I'll end up buying her some temp. paint if my sister doesn't.

I just realized that they finally covered that ugly graffiti in my general neighbourhood area. Normally I don't mind Graffiti BUT it was horrible and disguisting lookin'. It was just scribbles. Not artisticness to it. I didn't even understand what it said, something along the lines of ocha town? No fuckin' idea.

Which reminds me of this: http://www.pro8news.com/news/blog/42646037.html

Tomorrow is that stupid pyshical. Really, what is the point? AND WHY DO THEY DECIDE TO DO IT WHEN LAREDO HEAT REACHES 101 DEGREEs? I don't want to go but I really don't feel like lying to my mother. My plan was to go to school, get picked up by my sister right after she drops me off and stay home till lunch. But.. I don't know. Still debating. I have a feelin' tomorrow is going to go BAD.

Oh, well.

Fly Trapped In a Bottle

I remember going across to Nuevo Laredo (Mexico) a lot when I was a little girl. Iwould go with my dad, my Willita (grandmother), and my cousin David. I remember we use to walk our way across and back, it was too much of a hassel to take the car. We would buy this most amazing ice cream ever. It was vanilla, but it tasted BETTER. And the strawberry ice cream was even better. We use to wait for my Tia Socoro at one of the bus stops across. Every now and then she would come and visit us from Guadalajara. I remember we would buy fruit cups, ice cream, lucas candy, and Coca-Cola in glass bottles while we waited for Tia Socoro to get to town. My cousin David and I would have contests to see who could snort the most Lucas without crying or having a nose bleed. (Yeah, we were pretty stupid kids back then.)

There was one time when we were waiting for Tia Socoro, David and I started talking about myths and legends. My Willita brought up several ones but there was one that actually stuck to me for some reason. I cannot remember it quite clearly but it had to do with something about catching a fly in a glass Coca-Cola bottle. Then some man who come and visit you in the middle of the night to leave you money. My cousin was scared of it because they said he would come as the most ugliest creature/human ever. My cousin always wanted to try it but he was afraid of the outcome.

In fact, I don't think we've ever ended up trying it. I guess we must have been afraid. I should really bring this up to him in the next family get-together.

What?

My niece told me I'm "such a great artist and writer".

Then she asked me, "Why are you a great artist?"

"Why are you a great writer?"

I have no idea what brought this up.. she just said it. I looked at her puzzled. She just starred back at me.

I guess sometime she tries to be like me.

She's been wanting a journal like mine so she just carry around all the time just like I do.

I don't know..am I flatter?

Friends With a Mormon

I never knew that I use to be best friends with a Mormon. Normally you'd think that Mormons are those annoying people that go riding their bikes door to door bothering people telling them that their religion is "blah, blah, blah". Well, apparently she wasn't, her family wasn't like that.

The only reason that I remember this was because I went to a mass today with my parents for my Tio Alex, who recently passed away. There was this little girl was an alter server that looked like my friend (from Elementary) named Ana when she was little. She had the long hair and the puffy cheeks. It was almost like her. After the mass my parents and went to Logan's for dinner. My mom brought up the little girl and then we started talking about Ana.

I remembered going to a church with her. It was a totally different experience. Everything was actually. I asked my mom what was her religion, she stopped to think about it. First, she thought they were Jehovah Witnesses, but then she remembered that they were Mormons. I made a face, I didn't know they were Mormons. My mom laughed, surprising, eh? It was. I had never realized that they were Mormons.

Oh, no, I don't have anything against Mormons, or any religion in general. I'm just not a religious person. I guess it surprised me because the only friends I had ever been with were just Christians and Catholics, only because 99.8% of the city are made of Christians and Catholics.

After my mom told me that, I guess I felt good inside. It was different.

Now, I wish I had more of a dose of other religions.

Something different.

And I just realized, Ana's brother Dean, was surprisingly hott.

I remember he used to have blue hair, and I believe his room was blue too. I remember some drawings on the wall. Maybe even some bunk beds. I don't remember clearly. I remember playing Duck Hunt. I believe he was bipolar, if I recall correctly.

Hannah Montana has taught..

my niece to tell my sister that she is the worst mom ever.

I must admit that Hannah Montana is too much for Disney.

They could do without her.

I had wished that the movie would've be the end of her.

This, What I Thought I Knew; This, What I Thought Was True..

Been working on swaps all week, nothing much really.
School will probably start on Monday.
Eh, don't want to AP test.
I wonder what's changed.
I still feel sick.
But I can't complain.

It will be a year on the 27th that I had my 2nd art journal (which I have falled to fill out in one year).

Haha..

Eno Inspires.

You'd think that will all the anxiety & throwing up..

I would've gotten use to it by now.







Last night was horrible. I threw up twice. Once my food, the other all the water I drank.

I was starting to dehydrate.

Man, fuck this.

I Find It Funny

When you say that you're starting to hate her, but in reality you're becoming JUST LIKE HER. Really, quit the bullshit and tell me you're in love with her. Our friendship is being damage by someone who doesn't even wants us to be friends. Sad, but very true.

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Two weeks... bring it on.

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I need to write a short story for a swap. (http://www.swap-bot.com/swap/show/35771)

What can I write to go along with this beginning line:

The silence of the room was deafening...?

Free Comic Book Day

Damn.. I'm such a geek.

Oh, how I love you...

Oh, how I love you And in the evening, when we are sleeping We are sleeping. Oh, we are sleeping.

Wow, I just kept clicking block quote. Whoops.

It's a Funny Thing Actually

Isn't it funny when somebody hits you accidentally and laugh while they're saying sorry?

I never really appreciated that. My mother accidentally hit me with the step ladder and I told her to watch it because I was on the floor. Sure enough within five seconds she had forgotten and hit me in the back with it. Great. And now she's angry because I'm upset at her for laughing. This pointless "argument" or "silent treatment" will last for days due to the fact that my mother and I are stubborn.

I saw an interesting fellow today.

He exchanged glances and I just look down.

He stopped in his tracks.

I kept walking.

I can't help but always do that. I end up shutting myself down. Well, on the brighter side: Swine Flu has taken over our school district. I can't tell if I'm HAPPY about school being closed for two weeks or if I'm pissed off at the fact that I have no time to do my finals and my school work at the same time. Plus, AP testing. Etc.

I need...escape.

Well, I must send in my swaps. Possibly tomorrow I'll drive over to the Post Office then go grab a cup of coffee. I don't know. Depends on what time I wake up.

I'll post my dreams later.

Swine flu closed down our schools for two weeks! Should I be happy about it? I just want to graduate already, goddaammmmmiit!