oh, dear.

I forget about this thing and I wish I didn't. These past two-three weeks have been interesting. My friend Alex and I have been hanging out a lot lately. We've been going for walks, talking about life, and playing music (mostly him though). This have been getting better.

Two Saturdays ago, Martin, Alex, Jenni, Gabi, and I hung out. We didn't know what to do so we hung outside of the school near my house in the middle of the night. Some weird white truck passed by us really slowly, did a u-turn and stopped in front of us. It turned on its headlights and then the undercover cop lights went on. It was definitely an OH SHIT moment. The cop was nice, he just asked us what we were doing and we told him we were deciding what to do since the cafe we wanted to go to was closed. The cop laughed and said, "I hear ya. There's nothing to do here." He told us to be safe and left. We decided to go to Taco Palenque but then decided on iHop instead. Best choice ever.

Between this time and Friday, probably Monday, Alex and I went for a walk and took my dogs with us this time. We took a break and sat down by the school and a cop pulled up by us again. This time this guy was just an asshole. I'm not saying all cops are, but this one didn't even give us a break. We were just listening to music and playing with my dogs. He asked for our ideas and Alex should him his. He then began to ask us questions and asked me if my dogs belonged to me. I tried holding back my anger and just told him yes. After he tried being all tough shit he said, "SO YOU ALL ARE ON YOUR WAY HOME, RIGHT?" And we looked at him like WHAT THE FUCK. It wasn't even past eleven yet. We just told him yes and just kept walking. Damn asshole.

Last Friday, I helped make some decorations for the LCC Dance with Kappa Pi. It was a productive day. I went to dinner with my parents and then went out walking with Alex afterwards. We ended up seeing the most amazing meteor hit the atmosphere. It was a bright green color and had a tail that looked like sparks. Once it passed through the atmosphere, it broke into two to three pieces. It lasted for a little more than 5 seconds and it was just the most amazing thing ever.

Last Saturday, Jenni, Gabi, Alex, and I went to go to a cafe. We stopped at the new cafe called Caffe Dolce but they didn't open 'til five. So, we decided to go to Cuadro's instead. We waited in the parking lot for the longest time but they never opened. We then decided to go back to Caffe Dolce and agreed that it was the best decision ever. We all got a cupcake, Alex and I got a coffee, and Jenni got a grilled cheese sandwich. Honestly, it was the best food I've ever had in the longest time. Afterwards, I had to go babysit and Alex had to go clean up his house. Alex dropped Jenni and Gabi to get Jenni's car and they met me at my house while Alex dropped me off at home. I put make-up on Jenni and we had the biggest laugh attack ever from reading our "Warped Tour Story" from middle school that Jenni and I wrote. Alex met us later on during the night and we talked for a long while. Jenni and Alex got preoccupied by playing with my toy gun. Gabi left after a while and Jenni, Alex, and I were getting chilled out in my room. Jenni fell asleep and Alex and I just talked. Alex and I did the most laziest hug in the world and Jenni woke up and freaked us out.

Yesterday, I got into an arguement with some rediculous, closed-minded asshole in my Photography class. Our teacher was giving us our new assignment and we had to mimic the style of the Photographer. There was one Photographer who did nudes. The teacher would go around the class showing the picture and every time our teacher would show the nude to the asshole's way, he'd be like "omfgeww". To ANY picture of ANYTHING naked, or even just a picture of a girl's back showing, he would over react and cover his eyes. Our teacher then said, "I bet you all want to mimic his photography now, right?" And jokingly, I said, "I know who isn't!" He asked me who and I pointed to the asshole. Then the asshole spoke, "WHY NOT?" Then I began to argue. "Because every time they show you a nude picture you get all freaked out and cover your eyes." Then he got mad and said, "WELL, I'M NOT A PERVERT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE." Then me, Ray, and Jessica, got completely offended by him. My teacher started to laugh and thus beginning the debate of "Porn or Art". We ended up taking a break and I went out to drink water. The guy followed me and asked me if I was going to take nudes. I told him I would like to, but it wouldn't be likely. He then said only pervs did that. I got even more offended and told him I woke take some nudes just to piss him off. I pushed him out of my way and walked back to class. My teacher told me, Jessica, and Ray about some extreme nude artist and we looked it up on my iPhone. We started laughing about it and went looking through all the pictures, along with some guy that sits on the other side of the table. The asshole walks in and sat in his place. The asshole asked what we were looking at and we told him it was rated TV-MA times XXX. He called us perverts and turned around. We found a picture that was completely rated "XXX" and showed it to our teacher. The asshole then gets near our teacher trying to see the picture that we were showing him. Ray and I caught him and just snatched my phone back.

In all seriousness, this guy is just a creep. I know I shouldn't say anything bad, but he's just completely disrespectful, closed-minded, arrogant, and just a plain out idiot. I wish this guy will get what's coming for him now. I'm a hothead and I was seriously about to take him out in front of everybody. Calling us artists "perverts" is just plain wrong. One day his going to push someone's button and really get it then.

Well, anyways, later on that day, Alex came over for a bit and we just talked and played guitar. He tried teaching me yesterday but I made it difficult for him. I felt uncomfortable inside with my family being downstairs so we went outside. We sat on the floor and were about to play but then we heard an owl. We walked across the street to see if it was there but it still sounded farther. We put in our guitars and decided to go search for the owl. Somewhere along the line, Alex had to go to the bathroom and I waited outside of his house. I got freaked out pretty badly but some cats that were running around, fighting. We walked towards the school near my house and we forgot about the owl. We laid down outside of my house for a while and I saw a meteor. Sadly, Alex didn't see it.

Today I didn't go to school because I woke up late and I just didn't feel too good about it. They also ended up cancelling my hair appointment today. Well, at least I got to wash my car and vacuum the inside.

I'm tired now. I want someone to come over, but I doubt that's going to happen. Oh, well. Maybe this weekend.

Forgetful

I forgot to post last week. I'll admit it.. I am forgetful, but let's not forget, I'm still human! Anyways, I'm having a hard time remembering last week.

I:

- was able to do my prints for class and extra prints.

- attended another Kappa Pi meeting on Friday.

- went out with my family for dinner on Friday.

- dragged Alex out to take pictures with me Saturday and Sunday.

- have been having terrible nightmares.

That's all I can remember so far.

Today was a good day in a sense that there was an amazing cold front this morning.

I got to develop my film today. Wednesday I make prints. Sadly, I didn't get a silhouette.

Fotografia

So, last week I had mentioned that I was cut open again. Well, I missed about three days of school and worried that I would fall behind. I would've gone to class, but I was under so much medication that I couldn't even get up from my bed. This week I returned to all my classes and found out that they really didn't do much. I was able to catch up quickly and get ahead. I was sad for a while because I missed my Photography last week when we were going to do prints from our negatives for the first time. Mr. Johnson (my photography teacher) replied back to my e-mail and told me what I had missed and told me that he assigned for us to take more pictures by using the blurring/panning/freezing techniques. All weekend I forgot about it, then remembered on Sunday and got unbelievably worried. I didn't want to get more behind, so Monday morning I went to school early bought three films and tried taking some shots. I couldn't get any good ones at school, so I decided to ditch Yoga and picked up my friend Gabi to go take pictures with me at the park. Luckily, I was able to arrive at school on time and I was able to develop my film. I was happy that I was able to get some decent shots. I was only able to do my contact sheets and no prints, so I was excited for Wednesday.

Thursday sucked. Design I was alright, but Biology was just absolutely horrible.

Yesterday, I had an absolutely fantastic day. For some reason, I just woke up in the best mood of my life. The night before I was stressing out on a presentation because I had to put it together for my group and one of them didn't send me their information because they wrote my e-mail down wrong. Luckily, that morning I checked my e-mail and it was there. She had done her own slide for our PowerPoint so I was able to just insert it without any problems. Then Yoga was pretty much fun! It's a lot of work and movement, but it's totally fantastic. Right now I don't have much upper body strength than I do lower body, so I just have to really work on that. Then Photography was just ABSOLUTELY AMAZING. I was finally able to make three prints of my panning/blurring/freezing assignment. I was actually working faster than the other students. I would've been able to do five prints, but it was my first time making prints. I had a slow start because he made me start off with contrasting, burning, and dodging, instead of just printing. But I must say, it was pretty fun. My teacher saw me working hard and told me that I could take a break. I laughed and told him that I was having too much fun to stop. He told me that maybe photography could be my calling. And you know what? I think so, too.

Today was an okay day, I can't complain much. Design I went by pretty fast, so it was good. There was a Kappa Pi meeting two hours after I got out of class, so I picked up my friend Gabi and went to eat at Taco Bell with her.

Anyways, here's the three prints I made yesterday:

Lonely

I'm feeling really down at the moment and I've been trying to cheer myself up. I hate being so shy. It's unbelievably hard for me to even speak up some times. Maybe I'm just too scared of being judged.

Anyways, I went to the doctor again this past week. They had to cut me open again, but this time they REALLY injected me with medication to numb me. Only reason they did so was because I got an anxiety attack and started to cry in front of the doctor. Being cut open hurts like hell. My pain level is low. I even go crazy when people tug at my hair. I'm really sensitive to things.

I have a crush on someone and I hate it.

I really need to find closure.

New Beginnings

Apparently, there was a fire at my college yesterday. One of the art majors I know posted on Facebook that our art gallery caught fire. They were thinking that lightning hit it. It's so unbelievably! And we barely opened the gallery three days ago for the student art show. I hope the gallery can be salvaged. At least the artwork was supposedly saved, so that's good news.

On Thursday I went to a Kappa Pi (art ferturnity) meeting and decided to join! I've had class with most of the people who are in it, so it isn't so bad. Yesterday, Mr. Short held a meeting for the art majors but only a few people went. It was okay.

I'm slowly stepping out of my comfort zone and trying to do new things. Hopefully I will go get the guts to go apply for a job.